WaiWai: Saucy spontaneity not just something that pops up out of the blue

This article is reproduced from the discontinued, but much loved Mainichi Waiwai column by Ryann Connell. Read more about this at the bottom of this article.

In a land where advanced planning is as highly esteemed as it is in Japan, spontaneity is not just something that pops up out of the blue. And the bedroom, it seems, is no exception, according to Spa! (10/11).

Mood can make or break what’s supposed to be a romantic liaison between lovers. A simple slip could ruin the atmosphere and spoil the night.

Despite a widespread belief that Japanese women are passive when preparing conditions for intimate encounters, Spa! says they’re actually working like busy little beavers to make sure their trysts come off perfectly.


“Nothing’s worse than reaching that point in time you’re just about ready to start and it’s a matter of ‘God, where’s the condom?'” a 27-year-old woman says. “The instant you have to start looking around for one, the moment is destroyed.”

Plenty of other girls seem to think along the same lines, with 30 of 250 women polled by the men’s weekly say that if they think there’s a chance they may be snuggling up, they always make sure they know precisely where they can easily get their hands on some birth control.

Just having the rubber ’round, though, is not always enough for some, with 14 saying that they do everything to make sure that they have a condom with the packet open and ready to be slipped on in a moment’s notice.

Attire also gets plenty of attention, with 23 of the 250 saying that strenuously avoid wearing clothes like jeans that are hard to remove — or have removed — in the heat of the moment.

Cleanliness is another area given high priority.

“I’m constantly checking to make sure I have enough tissues in the home. If I don’t have enough in boxes, I give them a refill using pocket tissues,” a 31-year-old woman tells Spa!

If cleaning up beforehand is held highly, then it’s doubly important once the deed is done.

“Every time I know there might be some activity, the waste-paper basket is moved to a place pretty close to my bed,” a 29-year-old woman says.

Some go even further when it comes to the tendency to have absolutely everything they feel they need within arm’s reach.

“I gathered up all my old stockings,” a 29-year-old writer tells Spa! “Because I figured my boyfriend would probably enjoy ripping the stockings I was wearing.”

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(The Mainichi Waiwai column ran online from April 19, 2001 – June 21, 2008. It was a much loved form of entertainment amongst foreigner in and outside of Japan. To any reader it was obviously not serious news, but it was a set of articles that portrayed quite well how the Japanese tabloids actually write about their own country. In 2008, a small number of Japanese people bought it to the attention of rival news groups that Mainichi was running an anti-Japan column on its website. With the bad publicity, Mainichi was forced to shut the page down, and take punitive measures against the journalists that were working on it, claiming that it was receiving opinions that were critical of the column, such as “its contents are too vulgar” and “the stories could cause Japanese people to be misunderstood abroad”. A perfect example of how Japanese consider what they write in their own script to be an acceptable secret code, that the rest of the world cant understand. When that same tabloid rubbish gets inconveniently translated to English to make light of some aspects of the Japanese people, it gets canned. Stippy.com finds this unacceptable, and will reproduce as much of the Waiwai content as possible in order to bring it once again to our computer screens for a good laugh. Of course we claim no credit for this content, and attribute it to it’s writers who were former Mainichi employees. Waiwai in its true and glorious form has been discontinued, but it’s legacy will live on at stippy.com for all to enjoy.)

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