Drinkable turds have saved the fortunes of troubled Japanese municipalities, according to Weekly Playboy (3/9). Many Japanese municipalities like tiny Tenkawa in a rustic part of Nara Prefecture were hit hard by the London Convention, which bans the dumping of human waste in oceans from July 2007. But, thanks to Kunihiko Yamamoto, the president of an Osaka water purification company, they can now pooh-pooh their problems with a scatological soda.

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About the only things to have toughened up in postwar Japan, are shoes and women.

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Outbound travel has been hit hard this year by such factors as the war on Iraq and the SARS outbreak, but plenty of Japanese have headed overseas on underground tours involving sex, slavery and savagery, according to Tokusatsu Shinsengumi.

For Japanese men sick of plying professionals, there are always the rape brokers of Vietnam – touts who’ll apparently drag a woman off the streets so a Japanese man can violate her.

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Russian Roulette is filled with inherent dangers, but Japanese schoolgirls have apparently devised a version where there are plenty of shots fired, but none of them are bullets, according to Hanashi no Channel.

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Nothing like the fragrance of fresh fish to stimulate one’s appetite, right guys? We’re talking, of course, about sushi, one of the more popular comestibles to grace the Japanese table at mealtimes.

But only in Japan, perhaps, could one find such an creative means to appeal to two distinctly different physical urges. To find out more, a reporter for That’s Dan (February) journeys to Otaru, the Hokkaido port city on the sea of Japan, where he has heard an underground establishment is offering an erotic twist to this traditional fare. In fact, that’s the name of the shop: Ero Sushi-ya.

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Is a vibrating condom a humdinger? Apparently so, according to an otherwise skeptical Shukan Post (9/6), which notes that Japanese sex lives are becoming like sports where those who are least proficient often have the best tools to at least make them look the part.

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Though it’s been a tough slug for the past decade or so, Noughties Japan still leads the world when it comes to such technological wonders as supertankers, cars, household electronics, audio-visual equipment and, especially, life-sized figurines.

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I’ve done it in a Shibuya nightclub toilet once before. It was because I was with this really nice guy. He picked me up when I went to the club with a friend,” she says. “Once I got drunk, I couldn’t hold back anymore, so just whipped down my pants and let him do it there.

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Dad comes home from an “adult toy store” and hands his wife a chastity belt. She nods and turns to the couple’s 15-year-old son. “Let’s go,” she says. They disappear into the boy’s bedroom. The story begins with Japan’s obsessive exam culture. A boy’s whole future can depend on the senior high school he gets into. Some mothers will do anything to make sure their junior high school sons pass the all-determining entrance exams. Anything? Pretty nearly.

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Hey guys, wanna go “nampa?” It can be more fun than the rumba, and if you learn the steps right, you can score with a girl.

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